The cliff walk had been a favourite of Conor’s, but the path, too, had deteriorated since. He had pirouetted her down the last steep step, hands on her waist. Eyes on the horizon. Her friends all said ‘And are you happy to just wait?’ In the end, she hadn’t been.
*
The path is the council’s responsibility, but the cost of fixing things – shoring up where gravel is careening towards the sea – is ‘prohibitive’ and ‘not in this year’s area plan’. And so: notices; some tape, the ragged ends of which flicker in the wind. Walk this path at your own risk, the signs imply. Turn back.
*
Kate’s foot slides on the river of scree leading to the beach. She might tumble down the two metres, three metres, to where this new guy, John, is ahead of her, safely landed. She wants for him to hold out a hand to help her down. She wants for her heart to beat normally again. She wants.
*
Kate will fall, sliding on grazed skin down, down to the sand, and she will sprain, no break, her ankle. She will sue the council and lose – the signs, the tape.
Or,
Kate will steady herself, flex her knees, find her balance. She will skid down the incline in minute steps. The stones will slither and tremble, but she will make it, thighs shaking, to the sand. To where John waits, saying ‘I knew you could do it.’
And,
She will waver.
Author's Note:
For so long, I used music to calm my mind, as meditation. This year, I found out that I’m neurodivergent–I’m autistic and have ADHD. Now, I use music not to calm, but to stimulate my brain, something it was missing. I’m obsessed with the music of singer Marina – her songs are like flash fictions – have a listen to one of my favourites, Lies. I create a wall of sound with my noise-cancelling headphones – in my bubble, I get into my writing zone, and stay there, writing, listening, writing.
Fiona McKay is the author of The Top Road, AdHoc Fiction (2023), and Drawn and Quartered, Alien Buddha Press (2023). Words in Bath Flash, Janus Literary, Lost Balloon, Gone Lawn, New Flash Fiction Review, Pithead Chapel, The Forge, Ghost Parachute, trampset, and others. She lives in Dublin, Ireland.
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